Friday, January 05, 2007

Local Girl Attempts to Defy Mother's Instructions

Maybe when I'm 58,000 years old and the ruler of the universe will my mother finally decide that I'm old enough to make some of my own decisions. At the current time, we are embroiled in a bitter dispute about exactly this point.

It started when I had the unmitigated temerity to send The Maid home to her family in the Philippines for Christmas and New Year. Either that, or leave her to mind an empty house whilst we spend quality time with the In-Laws in The America. At the time these arrangements were made, I erroneously concluded that this was my own business and therefore failed and/or wilfully refused to get my mother's permission before booking the air ticket.

The Maid then made the fatal mistake of mentioning this to my mother's maid. Suddenly I started receiving urgent calls from relatives in Hong Kong and Singapore. How can you do this to your mother, they begged to know. Do you know she is very upset with you? Do you know you are not supposed to send your maid home for the first year?! Now you are prohibited from sending her home for another 3 years! Prohibited!

After these calls had been concluded, and as though there were some kind of timetable unknown only to me, my mother arrived at my home to deliver the prohibition order herself. She also asked me to please stop leaving my clothes on the chair in my bedroom (or else! I will disinherit! you!)

Being the oldest child and a filial daughter, I said "Hm hm hm" and did not agree nor disagree. Then I made myself scarce, leaving her to watch High Five (Space Magic!) with The Son. This tactic used to work, maybe, 13 years ago. Now she's starting to suspect I'm just ignoring her orders. So it's been nag nag nag and "Hm hm hm" for several weeks now and she's really starting to suspect that I'm ignoring her orders. I can sense the impending doom as she makes arrangements to change her will and rob me of my 33% of her estate (my stupid brother is getting 34% because he has a penis).

Now that the trip is over and my maid is returning today, I actually started to think that all this was said and done, then I get another call from another auntie today. Hey! Your mother called me last week! Did you send your maid home for a vacation? She slammed down the phone on me when I suggested to her that it was your own business! What's all this about!?

So now there's a whole lot of stress to deal with, out of completely nothing. Dammit.


At 7:10 AM, Blogger The UnCensored Mama said...

Why does your mother not want the maid to go home during the first year?

At 12:56 PM, Blogger knobby said...

It's not the maid going home, it's the not asking for permission that's the problem. Eh, smoot?

At 2:06 PM, Blogger gremlin said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

At 2:08 PM, Blogger gremlin said...

wha...?! man. she's nuts. ok, but seriously. I think it's your going to visit the other mother (aka MIL) that could have created the problem? using maid going home as pawn to express insecurity? unhappiness? erm, jealousy? whoa. poor thing. I mean, poor you. stuff like dat, makes you wanna LEAVE THE COUNTRY TO A DAMN FAR AWAY PLACE. dint I tell ya? dat's why am outta there. makes things a 100 times easier. can't live with them, can't live without them - solution, live so far away, it takes a lot of money and time to get physically proximate. of course, practice restraint when you're in this FAR AWAY country and dun answer the phone too often either

At 10:37 PM, Blogger Little Miss Drinkalot said...

Maybe your mom had grand plans to use your maid while you were gone. You know, wash the leaves of her plants, re-line the clothes drawers, polish the furniture...

At 11:52 PM, Blogger valkyrie said...

you've made her look bad because she didn't let her maid go home for some cosy family time! tsk tsk.

At 12:59 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm with knobby on this one, think it's not the going home part so much as the failing to ask for permission part. Sounds like my mom. And dad. But I'm not filial and I'm not the eldest child so instead of pretending to comply I start opening my big mouth (not to say "Hmm hmm hmm") and then heads will roll. Actually just my head.

At 2:29 PM, Blogger HairyDonut said...

Uncensored Mama: Her view is that it is not in line with local practice. She even called random maid agencies to check this point. Not in local practice means we also cannot do.

Knobby: I think it's both, and both equally.

Gremlin: I think I saw your MIL on the plane from Narita to Singapore. She travelled out on 4 Jan?

LMD: Even if there was nothing to do, she would've created something to do. She has previously ordered my maid to iron all of our pajamas.

Val: Yeah, she did get a lot of grief from her own maid. LIKE IT'S MY PROBLEM!!!!!!!!

VPS: I think you just have to get them used to it. My sister is a lot less compliant, and my mother is filled with joy and peace whenever my sister fails to answer back.

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