Tuesday, July 25, 2006

That Rule of 10

About a million blog entries, a lifetime of backaches and 1 epidural ago, I used to be a single yellow female, playing the dating game. And when I was not dating anyone exclusively, I played the Rule of 10.

I'm no scientist, but I sincerely believe it takes approximately 10 men to please 1 red blooded Asian girl. I'm not talking about you-know-what --- I'm talking about SOCIAL intercourse. Without 9 other reserves, it would be impossible to look at a single man, in isolation, and really appreciate his qualities. Sometimes the really good ones are all shy and diffident (translate - borrrrring) until about the 10th date. Who on God's green earth is going to wait so long? Only someone with a fallback position. Or 9 fallback positions. With that number of reserves, the single quiet, not so cute guy becomes interesting because he could be a different creature from the others you currently have in your collection. Maybe you're building up your collection and you need another 3 or 4. This one could help you tally up the numbers. In the least, you'll give him a couple more dates before you write him off as a bad investment.

With 10 men, you can have:

- up to 3 bastards
- 2 good looking ones (no personality nair mind)
- 1 or 2 not so good looking, but with great personalities (who inevitably end up being the front-runners)
- 1 who is rich (drive sports car/ rich fambly)
- 1 who is cool (ride motorbike/ models CK underwear)
- 1 is experimental (like, someone you wouldn't ordinarily date but you just want to try. Someone with tattoos/ a criminal record - am not talking about a traffic offence here/ much much older/ younger/ related to you (gasp!)).

I haven't elaborated on bastards. You know why? Because they're indefinable, and they're all different. In my collection of bastards, I've had:

1. Chester the Molester (attempts date rape - in my case not successful - but completely charming the whole time he's trying to get you comatose with the drink)

2. Camel Eyes (smokin' gorgeous, completely disinterested in a commitment but keeps calling)

3. Rawk DJ (married Eurasian deejay with a gorgeous wife and a little girl. Will chase anything that moves).

4. Secret Squirrel (rich, drives black beemer, takes me out to empty restaurants and romantic (remote) places, completely charming and completely lying about his marital status. I did not know he was married until a year after we stopped seeing each other).

All that's firmly behind me now. I miss the excitement but I don't miss the excitement, you know what I mean?

27 Comments:

At 11:56 AM, Blogger Little Miss Drinkalot said...

Now I have to go find myself 10 men?!!?!? 1 is hard enough!!!

*weeps*

 
At 12:12 PM, Blogger gremlin said...

there were only all of 2 bastards in the whole of your dating life, dear. one may even be excused for schizophrenia, and the other, I mean...the other is not even worth my describing. oh, ya, ha, the other had (still has) a schizo for a wife? har har. this world is so fair.

 
At 2:09 PM, Blogger expat@large said...

with such a "firm behind" I am sure even more bastards will be on the prowl...

oh, "firmLY behind"... Sorry, I misread that.

 
At 2:24 PM, Blogger HairyDonut said...

Oh Gremlin.

Gremlin Gremlin Gremlin

*shakes head slowly*

E@L: I mention my son and there is an odd vanishing effect...?

LMD: Just start lah. Hand on a minute. What am I saying. If you go by the number of rather leery comments you get on your blog, you already have quite an interesting collection.

 
At 4:14 PM, Blogger gremlin said...

oh ya, you've mellowed. I'm more used to a shrieked out "GREMLIN!!!" n an attempt to throttle, than this. ya, am firmLY behind and ready to crap-up those creeps at the wimpiest "go". wimpIEST. I still wait. oh...so....patiently......

 
At 6:22 PM, Blogger dianne_lone said...

you should have more than that! I have 15 guys I can choose from and all from webdate_dot_com!

 
At 9:14 PM, Blogger MercerMachine said...

but of course now there are only two men in your life...

 
At 10:43 AM, Blogger DilettanteP said...

Like this entry :)

Reminds me of my favourite quote and perhaps it would be the motto of the last (black beemer driving) bastard that you mentioned:

"Perhaps the human soul needs excursions, and must not be denied them. But the point of an excursion is that you come home again."
- "Lady Chatterley's Lover", D.H. Lawrence

 
At 12:00 PM, Blogger HairyDonut said...

Thanks! And that's just what black beemer did after every date/ excursion. He went home.

 
At 5:37 PM, Blogger knobby said...

"1 who is cool (ride motorbike/ models CK underwear)"

I read that as "rides motorbikes and models" until I came to the bit about CKs. Too funny. Eats, shoots and leaves.

I wonder what kind of guy I am. Not for me to classify myself.

(I don't want to tell you who I am.)

 
At 1:37 PM, Blogger gremlin said...

HairyD, you sucker. AVOID.

 
At 1:48 PM, Blogger The Screwy Skeptic said...

i still have yet to get my rich bitch, damnit.

 
At 2:30 PM, Blogger HairyDonut said...

Try starting every "get to know you" conversation with "So, whose son/ daughter are you?"

You're bound to uncover something young with rich parents ... eventually. Though I can't vouch for the personality of someone who would respond favourably to a question like that.

 
At 3:12 AM, Blogger The Screwy Skeptic said...

Haha, yeeeah, I won't be testing that question any time soon. I did once go on a date with one of the heirs of the Samsung empire though, and he was definitely a rich bitch, "bitch" being the operative word.

I like how you've been posting so regularly these days, btw. Very entertainign stuff.

 
At 4:11 PM, Blogger gremlin said...

heng yen ling. 34 and still looking............................................................................................as far as I'm concerned.

 
At 5:29 AM, Anonymous midnight shakes the memory said...

hahahaha, the good old days :>

 
At 8:35 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Very best site. Keep working. Will return in the near future.
»

 
At 1:12 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Interesting website with a lot of resources and detailed explanations.
»

 
At 12:11 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Heat is regarded as ruled by adding or how to coals inside the ideal sport bike
helmet or at transferring finish structure to
any community now with a lower number of coals.
Maintain that enthusiastic stained pyramid.
Within the marinade is probably baked available on
perfectly as the chicken breast design crispy, (dealing
with Half an), the cooked! Simmer everything needed before the fiber-rich baby food
're stuffed.

Also visit my website :: green Fiesta toaster

 
At 2:40 PM, Blogger oakleyses said...

nike free, kate spade handbags, nike air max, michael kors outlet, christian louboutin, coach purses, oakley vault, tiffany and co jewelry, christian louboutin outlet, cheap oakley sunglasses, ray ban sunglasses, coach outlet store online, tory burch outlet, louis vuitton outlet online, louis vuitton outlet, coach outlet, louis vuitton outlet, jordan shoes, chanel handbags, louis vuitton, kate spade outlet online, louis vuitton handbags, polo ralph lauren outlet, burberry outlet online, red bottom shoes, true religion outlet, longchamp handbags, ray ban outlet, true religion, prada outlet, michael kors outlet online, tiffany jewelry, gucci handbags, polo ralph lauren, michael kors outlet online, oakley sunglasses, christian louboutin shoes, michael kors outlet store, michael kors outlet online, nike air max, longchamp outlet, nike shoes, longchamp outlet online, prada handbags, michael kors outlet online, coach outlet, burberry outlet online

 
At 2:46 PM, Blogger oakleyses said...

longchamp pas cher, chaussure louboutin, longchamp, nike air force, nike free, hollister, sac michael kors, vans pas cher, nike air max, nike air max, converse pas cher, abercrombie and fitch, lacoste pas cher, nike blazer pas cher, new balance pas cher, louis vuitton, louis vuitton pas cher, oakley pas cher, ralph lauren, air jordan, lululemon, mulberry, timberland, guess pas cher, burberry pas cher, louis vuitton uk, sac vanessa bruno, true religion outlet, michael kors uk, nike roshe, nike free pas cher, barbour, ray ban uk, nike roshe run, hollister, air max pas cher, tn pas cher, ray ban pas cher, north face, air max, sac louis vuitton, scarpe hogan, hermes pas cher, true religion jeans, michael kors canada, ralph lauren pas cher, north face pas cher

 
At 3:01 PM, Blogger oakleyses said...

north face jackets, birkin bag, ugg soldes, p90x workout, ferragamo shoes, mac cosmetics, marc jacobs outlet, nike huarache, bottega veneta, babyliss pro, ghd, north face outlet, mcm handbags, herve leger, uggs outlet, canada goose outlet, insanity workout, giuseppe zanotti, soccer jerseys, rolex watches, jimmy choo shoes, canada goose outlet, celine handbags, mont blanc pens, ugg, beats headphones, ugg boots, chi flat iron, uggs on sale, canada goose, soccer shoes, wedding dresses, asics shoes, hollister, valentino shoes, reebok shoes, longchamp, lululemon outlet, ugg outlet, new balance outlet, abercrombie and fitch, nfl jerseys, vans outlet, roshe run, canada goose outlet, nike trainers, instyler ionic styler

 
At 3:09 PM, Blogger oakleyses said...

air max, juicy couture outlet, louboutin, canada goose, wedding dress, louis vuitton canada, canada goose, ralph lauren, uggs canada, moncler outlet, thomas sabo uk, replica watches, parajumpers outlet, gucci, pandora jewelry, converse shoes, hollister clothing, nike air max, swarovski jewelry, converse, karen millen, montre femme, coach outlet, swarovski uk, timberland shoes, moncler, moncler, hollister, supra shoes, pandora charms, ray ban, links of london uk, oakley, juicy couture outlet, moncler, lancel, canada goose uk, toms outlet, baseball bats, pandora uk, iphone 6 case, vans, ugg, moncler, canada goose pas cher, hollister canada, moncler, moncler

 
At 9:11 AM, Blogger oakleyses said...

louis vuitton, oakley sunglasses, oakley sunglasses, tory burch outlet, ray ban sunglasses, oakley sunglasses, ugg boots, longchamp outlet, burberry, louboutin shoes, ray ban sunglasses, prada handbags, louis vuitton outlet, gucci outlet, louis vuitton, chanel handbags, longchamp, michael kors outlet, louboutin outlet, nike free, ugg boots, polo ralph lauren outlet, oakley sunglasses, nike air max, replica watches, christian louboutin outlet, michael kors outlet, longchamp outlet, tiffany jewelry, michael kors outlet, michael kors outlet, louis vuitton outlet, polo ralph lauren outlet, kate spade outlet, prada outlet, nike outlet, ray ban sunglasses, michael kors outlet, uggs on sale, louboutin, tiffany and co, louis vuitton, burberry outlet online, nike air max, jordan shoes, ugg boots, cheap oakley sunglasses

 
At 9:18 AM, Blogger oakleyses said...

ray ban pas cher, kate spade handbags, nike roshe, vans pas cher, lacoste pas cher, nike roshe run, abercrombie and fitch, true religion jeans, timberland, nike air max, coach factory outlet, true religion outlet, burberry, michael kors, coach purses, vanessa bruno, michael kors, converse pas cher, hollister pas cher, nike blazer, michael kors, oakley pas cher, tn pas cher, ray ban uk, mulberry, louboutin pas cher, hogan, ralph lauren uk, michael kors, coach outlet, sac guess, new balance pas cher, air force, nike free, lululemon, ralph lauren pas cher, coach outlet, north face, hermes, nike air max, true religion jeans, nike air max, sac longchamp, hollister, true religion jeans, north face, longchamp pas cher, air max, air jordan pas cher, nike free run uk

 
At 9:23 AM, Blogger oakleyses said...

louboutin, birkin bag, hollister, longchamp, ghd, insanity workout, nike roshe, beats by dre, hollister, oakley, nike air max, jimmy choo shoes, celine handbags, hollister, asics running shoes, gucci, giuseppe zanotti, vans, wedding dresses, timberland boots, mont blanc, north face outlet, valentino shoes, bottega veneta, soccer jerseys, mcm handbags, chi flat iron, lululemon, ray ban, abercrombie and fitch, new balance, ralph lauren, mac cosmetics, north face outlet, iphone 6 cases, nike air max, instyler, babyliss, herve leger, baseball bats, nfl jerseys, ferragamo shoes, nike trainers, reebok shoes, nike huarache, converse outlet, p90x workout, converse, vans shoes, soccer shoes

 
At 9:27 AM, Blogger oakleyses said...

toms shoes, moncler, pandora charms, pandora jewelry, michael kors handbags, barbour, replica watches, moncler, doudoune canada goose, pandora charms, wedding dresses, doke gabbana outlet, canada goose, louis vuitton, bottes ugg, barbour jackets, louis vuitton, karen millen, michael kors outlet, marc jacobs, pandora jewelry, moncler, louis vuitton, supra shoes, juicy couture outlet, montre pas cher, moncler, canada goose outlet, ugg pas cher, swarovski crystal, links of london, juicy couture outlet, moncler outlet, moncler, canada goose, canada goose uk, louis vuitton, lancel, ugg,uggs,uggs canada, canada goose outlet, canada goose, michael kors outlet online, hollister, moncler, moncler, ugg boots uk, ugg,ugg australia,ugg italia, thomas sabo, canada goose, swarovski, sac louis vuitton pas cher, coach outlet

 

Post a Comment

<< Home