Monday, May 08, 2006

I'm So Happy That George is Safe!

My earlier blog entry voicing my annoyance about voting for a photograph was actually intended to mask my great personal concern that one of our MPs may not actually exist, or may have passed away unbeknownst to the rest of us, his constituency members, seeing as how we haven't seen him since dunno when.

Imagine my relief and delight when, on the same day that said annoyance was voiced through blog, the now mythical George was seen riding on a lorry with a loudspeaker which was driving through my little neck of the woods. Mythical George ("MG") was smiling and waving and looking very much alive and well. I know this only because my maid told me she had seen a man looking very much like the one on our PAP fridge magnet, but I'll take her word for it. That woman must be sharp. According to her, the lorry breezed through our little estate like greased lightning at about 6 pm on the eve of Election Day. I'm thinking that people engaged in a drive-by shooting probably go a little slower than that, but that's just my inner critic trying to spoil my happy moment.

MG, I'd like to thank you for making that last minute appearance which certainly puts to rest any concerns I may have that I could be voting for a dead guy on 6 May. I'm sorry I missed you (I was at work, like, probably 90% of the people in Aljunied) but if you could give me a little more notice in year 2011 when I'll next get a chance to see you again, I'd gladly put in an application for half-day leave. It'll be worth my time, since I have a lot of questions for you, like:

1. Is Aljunied very close to the beach? How come the block right next to Block 217 Serangoon Avenue 4 has a big sign that says "Welcome to Marine Parade (Serangoon Division)"? I was so excited at the prospect that the beach was close by that we actually got into a cab and spent S$10.20 on cab fare getting to the East Coast Food Centre. Maybe the stupid cab driver just took us the long way, eh?

2. Also, is it a crime to fill up a form unnecessarily, or to forget to submit the form after filling it up? I believe that Dante did allude to the 10th circle of hell, which must be a special place reserved for people who don't submit their forms and that was such a terrible thing that Dante couldn't bring himself to mention it. And how many ways and how many times can you ask someone about such an incident? Does it take 5 hours to frame all those questions properly?

3. How does a 6.1% win margin comprising 16,225 votes equate to a resounding victory? Maybe it's just me, but when I get a 6.1% annual increase in my salary, I don't equate as a resounding vindication of anything except that my boss is not happy with my performance. As regards the 2,000 or so spoilt votes, could it be because people who were smart enough, and able enough, to put on their underpants, shoes and clothes and make their way to some obscure void deck on Saturday couldn't manage to follow simple instructions to cross only 1 box?

I know these are tough questions and will take up unnecessary time that could well be spent travelling overseas. Thanks for your brief appearance last Friday and I hope to see you in 2011!

16 Comments:

At 10:36 PM, Blogger expat@large said...

Dante did write that chapter, but he forgot to submit it to his publisher.

 
At 9:49 AM, Blogger HairyDonut said...

Forgot to submit?! Did his publisher temper wrath with mercy and reasonableness, or did he prosecute?

 
At 8:57 PM, Blogger Mezzo said...

No, no, he submitted to his publisher. It's the supporting forms that he forgot to submit, then he argued with the publisher's secretary, who had no CCTV so could only burn the chapter in revenge.

 
At 7:34 PM, Blogger HairyDonut said...

Hur hur hur :)

 
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