Monday, February 06, 2006





The poor woman who has to express milk in the executive bathroom every day with her super-secret-super-quiet Avent breast pump has no way of knowing that we can hear her even from outside the bathroom. Through 2 closed bathroom doors, no less. I would hazard a guess that they can hear her even in the men's loo.

Either she's doing severe damage to her milk glands (in certain circles, this is politely referred to as 'producing strawberry milk') or the regulator in that breast pump badly needs replacement. But how to tell her?


At 4:51 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

How about asking her, "Kopi, Teh or Guni?"?

The Guru

At 5:47 PM, Blogger HairyDonut said...

Guni similan?

At 5:58 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Guni and lan are very different. The former is feminine and the latter is masculine.

The Guru

At 10:57 PM, Blogger dr.lowem said...

LOL, funny lar you both.

Err, just tell her lor! Or leave her a note... discreetly? Sounds hazardous, that pump she's using. Hopefully her nehs' not all warped and all now :P


At 6:45 AM, Blogger gremlin said...

poor woman. leave her alone. seriously, I dun think she cares so long as she gets that guni out for her baby. one day, when her baby's in the same school as yours and makes it ahead to the dean's'd be wondering why you dint do the squee thing too. leave her be. go mind your documents instead.

At 9:03 AM, Blogger Minx said...

Ya... I dun think the woman cares. Now I wonder whether my secretary can hear my Ameda Lactaline grunting away behind my closed door. But do I care if she does? Nah...

At 9:16 AM, Blogger HairyDonut said...

It's the Avent trap, I tells ya. I've had a similar experience. The pumps start off completely silent and they work beautifully.

Then after a few months, the squee squee squee can be heard throughout the office.

It's the rubber/ plastic regulator, I tells ya. And can you buy a replacement from Orchard Road? No. Must go all the way to some ulu fucked up location that only opens during office hours.

At 9:39 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

why dont you try the traditional squeeze squeeze method?

The Guru

At 9:52 AM, Blogger HairyDonut said...

Eh Guru, time to set up your blog leh.

At 10:05 AM, Blogger The Guru said...

The Hairy One, are you chasing me away or do you want a peek into my highly secret and reclusive life?

The Guru

At 10:24 AM, Blogger HairyDonut said...

Of course I'd like to have a peek. The comments you have posted over the past day or so have been endlessly intriguing. Who wouldn't like to know. So instead of doing a partial registration, why don't you complete what you have started and set up a blog?

At 10:31 AM, Blogger The Guru said...

If Mohammed will not come to the mountain, then the mountain must come to Mohammed.

Why do you want to go to the Mountain, when the Mountain has already come to you, O Hairy One.

At 2:03 PM, Blogger gremlin said...

she who cannot squeeze gotta live with the squee.

lemme hazard a guess. the guru's female and in a profession typified by highly-strung individuals...usually with manicured nails but sometimes bitten to the core, I mean, I get full marks?

At 2:10 PM, Blogger The Guru said...

Gremlin, you have to start evolving because in your current state, you have just gotten ZERO marks for your guess.

Think of a guru and you will think of an emaciated scrawny Indian man sitting cross legged on top of the mountain meditating. Well, I am everything but Indian or emaciated or scrawny. I am The modern Guru.

At 2:29 PM, Blogger HairyDonut said...

The Modern Guru is a Chinese man, medium height, sitting in an office chair.

And Gremlin, you know him.

At 2:39 PM, Blogger The Guru said...

Everyone thinks he/she knows the Guru.

I know Heidi Klum too but she has not gotten to know me yet.

At 10:33 PM, Blogger valkyrie said...

oi... call yourself a guru! you use that same Mountain-Mohammed line on everyone isit?

HD, this is the one i told you about lor! haha!

At 7:32 AM, Blogger gremlin said...

SLB?! omigod. you sure sound like a woman, man. sorry sorry. how live, the modern guru? all things good so far?

At 9:22 AM, Blogger HairyDonut said...

No, not SLB. Different person.

At 9:44 AM, Blogger The Guru said...

O Hairy One seems to think she knows me very well.

Anyway, nice to "meet" you, Valkyrie. I have heard lots about you while meditating in the mountain

At 10:17 AM, Blogger HairyDonut said...

Yes, I do. I've met all kinds of people in my line of work, including many assholes.

At 10:30 AM, Blogger The Guru said...

Ah..Such is life. Variety makes it interesting, otherwise it will be too monotonous.

At 2:10 PM, Blogger HairyDonut said...

Yes, that's true. Thanks for pointing that out. Actually although I've met many assholes, I've never met one that behaved like a duck. Can you behave like a duck?

At 2:50 PM, Blogger The Guru said...

Unfortunately, due to the recent threat of the avian flu, all fowl/foul related things are not allowed.

At 2:54 PM, Blogger HairyDonut said...

I guess we are fortunate that there isn't a similar restriction on cows/ bullshit otherwise you'd have a problem, eh.

At 3:11 PM, Blogger The Guru said...

Not where I am up in the mountain. The milk producing cows and their bullshit cant get up there.

At 4:19 PM, Blogger HairyDonut said...

Mohammed sees a mountain of bullshit.

At 4:56 PM, Blogger The Guru said...

Did Mohammed tell you that, Fatimah?

At 8:58 PM, Blogger valkyrie said...

is it that boring in california, The Guni?

At 3:56 AM, Blogger gremlin said...

mountains of bullshit and all. yawn! the guru's definitely a woman. leave her be lest she shits on her mountain and seeks your place for refuge instead! eew.

At 12:26 AM, Blogger valkyrie said...

i think he knows he ain't welcome here anymore than he was.

i'm just wondering aloud if El Segundo in Cali is really so boring that he has to do this. btw, he is an infonet user, running windows2000 and uses ie6.0.

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