Surely there's been a mistake here

So for the past 4 weeks I have against my will been adhering very strictly to the Newborn Infant Overnight Breastfeeding Timetable.

Which is to say I will start nodding off at 10pm, find myself awake at 2am (E@L: Do you mean 2am in the morning?) fall back asleep at 3.30am and wake up again, cursing and swearing, at the ungodly hour of 5.30am. All without the prompting of an alarm clock, mechanical or human. To say that I am extremely frustrated would be understating matters. I am extremely frustrated.

And yet somehow I'm not really tired the next day, just cranky and lacking in appetite. Don't know what to do about it since I can't exactly be taking any sleeping pills at the moment.

In other news, a colleague of mine has taken it upon himself to spread the word that I constantly malign my employer to third parties. Ironically, he tells third parties left right and centre that I malign The Firm.

I wrack my brains to recall such an occasion. I wonder if he could provide any helpful examples.

I check my blog entries, find nothing. It would be an idiot who maligns the very employer upon whom they depend for their livelihood.

I asked The Husband - do I ever talk about The Firm to you?

No, he said. You never do.

I ask my friends - do I ever talk about The Firm to you?

No, you don't. Why?

I mean, for God's sake, who is that stupid? If I were that stupid, I wouldn't even be able to dress myself in the morning.

This is just like the time when I caught the tail end of a rumour that my best guy friend and I were sleeping together.

Because I could not ever recall such an incident, I asked the Best Guy Friend, did I ever sleep with you? and he said, no and charmingly added that he was rather flattered by the rumour in any case.