A thin smooty veil of legitimacy was provided

So yesterday, after I WAS ROYALLY STOOD UP FOR LUNCH BY SOME PEOPLE, I decided to eat a quick lunch by myself. It's easy to make these decisions when, um, it's 15 minutes into the lunch hour, and everyone else has already left for their respective lunch appointments. Allow me to define ROYALLY STOOD UP for those of us who have yet to experience this:

Just plain "STOOD UP" is when the lunch appointment gets cancelled before it starts. Like if we are supposed to meet at 1pm, then you get the news before 1pm.

"ROYALLY STOOD UP" is when the time for meeting has already come and gone, you're standing around in the heat wave of a tropical concrete jungle afternoon wearing a fully lined full suit and then you get a call on the mobile phone.

But I digress. So after grabbing a quick lunch at the Kah Soh, where even the aunties seemed to be embarrassed that I was eating by my lonesome, I wandered around Telok Ayer Street looking for a cheap back massage. I don't know if you've noticed, but there are tonnes of cheap generic sounding back massages ("China Massage", "Traditional Chinese Massage", "Traditional Massage") available up and down the length and breadth of Telok Ayer Street. I picked "Traditional Chinese Massage", S$30 for 45 minutes, and walked into the second floor of an old skool shophouse unit.

Is it just me, or would anyone else have been vaguely suspicious if:

1. the whole shop is really, really dark;
2. the women are all young Chinese women, fully made up, wearing skimpy clothes;
3. you get your massage in a private room, where the door can shut and lock; and
4. male customers get a relatively much louder, more joyous greeting and not just from the receptionist.

Anyway, 30 dollars and 45 minutes later, I left feeling really really pain free, but really really odd. What does it mean if the woman who gave me a really great massage was wearing a skimpy white tank top, denim shorts and thick makeup? Does that make me a homophobe to even wonder?

And no, I was not offered a happy ending, thank you.