Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Feck

The husband's ex (whom I shall refer to as The Mad Bitch, no, The Crazy Stripper, no, Person Most Likely to Go To Hell, dammit I can't think of any worse names to use) has found his blog. And keeps writing all manner of rambly crap to him, along the lines of "Ooooh, I am a mad bitch but I still love you!" and "I always wanted to be a writer but no one will print the crap I produce so I have to make do with stripping!"

To put it mildly, I was enraged when he told me about it, but ever since we put in some "calming" feng shui influences into the house, I couldn't really get into a screaming fit like I would normally have. Very odd. But I am definitely thinking of ways to deal with MB.

To whom I would like to say "Hey Lao Chee Bye (she has been stripping for many years now), you had him first, you screwed it up, I don't care whether you need to put a kitchen knife into your eye to get him out of your mind but perhaps you should give some thought to moving on. You are not getting any younger, and if you would like to have children with whose father(s) you have more than a passing acquaintance, then you should also give some thought to changing your occupation. And because I bear no animosity towards you (because of the feng shui influence, not because you don't fully deserve it) here's a hint - don't become a writer. BECAUSE YOU SUCK!!!!"

Gawd damn! How does one deal with a mad bitch like this? [Suggestions are welcome. Suggestions which I implement successfully will be richly rewarded, provided you also help me move the body.]

12 comments:

  1. from what i can see, she will be a useless (but irritating) pest who won't be able to do much harm to your beautiful family, but i understand your need for inflicting damage (i'm a scorpio).

    suggestion 1: meat cleavers work better than knives.

    suggestion 2: believe in karma. in her next life, she will be a wife who loses her husband to a fugly stripper (with a lao cheebye).

    ReplyDelete
  2. ignore her. looks to me she has already lost big time and there's no way she's snaking her way back.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Suggest lessons for disposing of bodies in Out by Natsuo Kirino.

    Why am I always promoting Japanese novels?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous12:32 PM

    uhmmm.....try Ignoring

    Guru

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous11:17 AM

    how do u just find somebody's blog?
    hmmmmmm
    just wondering.....
    cheers
    david

    btw, what is the address to her blog?

    ReplyDelete
  6. I don't know if she has one - she just somehow managed to find his blog. Horrors.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Anonymous6:11 PM

    That's rite ... claim your MAN! Piss on your territory!

    Bitchy!

    G

    ReplyDelete
  8. The most popular and widespread modern use of the term is as a slang expletive in Irish English, employed as a less serious alternative to the expletive "fuck" to express disbelief, surprise, pain, anger, or contempt.An old Tudor phrase for lavatory, jacks is a term more commonly used in Ireland.love language test This is likely a reference to Jack Power, who invented the first multiple cubicle toilet.Yes, "fricking" or "freaking" are basically milder substitutes for the "F-word". They are thus LESS offensive than that word. But this does not make them inoffensive. Listeners will generally assume that you were considering using the more vulgar word but substituted this milder alternative.

    ReplyDelete